Getting Out
For the last 6 years I have been more or less homebound…During this last year my recovery has come to the point when I knew I was ready and needed to get out of this house. I no longer have a car, so needed something within comfortable walking distance; regardless of the weather. It was time to prove to myself that I was ready to participate in the real world and hopefully secure a job once again. My goal was seemingly simple; make a commitment to be somewhere when I said I would and fulfill all that was asked of me.
Since October I have been volunteering at the grammar school down the street. A very dear friend who has two children attending there let their teachers know of my eagerness to volunteer during Back to School night in September. A couple of weeks later I got a phone call from a 4th grade teacher who most definitely would appreciate some help in the afternoons, we set an appointment to meet a few days later. In the mean time I needed to get my tuberculosous clearance and background check going. When I arrived after school had let out there was a 2nd teacher there as well, Awesome! Mrs. C had the 4th graders and Mr. T had 5th graders. It was a wonderful meeting, I now had two hours filled in my Tuesday through Thursday afternoons, I bounded home that day. I was on my way.
The children were so receptive, they really helped to erase the bit of anxiety welling inside me. Everything moves very quickly in class but I have a super rapport with both teachers so the transistion was very easy. Yet, I wanted more. I spoke to the principal in passing one day about my desire to fill more time, he was more than willing to see what else there might be. Another young mother here at the complex explained that her 1st grade daughter’s teacher was needing some help in the mornings…perfect, I made an appointment and spoke with her. I now had Monday and Friday mornings in the 1st grade class of Mrs. L…Wow! someplace to be and something to do every day of the week. Color me happy.
I now not only had a purpose and was fulfilling a need, I was making friends both with the children and the adults, something I hadn’t done in many many years. There is something very warming to the soul when out of nowhere happy young faces come up and give you a big hug…sure puts a smile on my face and a bounce in my step. Yet, I wanted more…One afternoon in the break room while Mr. T and Mrs. C were finishing their lunches Mrs. C mentioned she had someone she wanted me to meet, I said great. She grabbed my arm and headed me out the door toward the 2nd grade wing, there she introduced me to Mrs. R, oh my, was she happy to have more help. She and I discussed what times I was available and what her needs were, that would work out great! But wait! Mrs. M walks in just as we were finishing, she had no helpers at all and could I? Oh but of course I can 🙂
Now, let’s see, Monday and Friday mornings I am with my 1st graders, Tuesday through Thursday I am with two classes of second graders then my 4th and 5th graders. Whew! I think that will hold me for now. The energy, enthusiasum, pride and love I am receiving in return for these small bits of time cannot be measured. I have found the best medicine in the whole world, I am truly grateful. We shall see what happens come June 8,that is the last day of school…
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I was on a single’s site a while ago and almost every gentleman requested that there be no baggage. What in the world does that mean? Aren’t we all products of the people, places, experiences and relationships that have come before? Don’t those all contribute to shape the people we are today? If we didn’t have these exposures what vapid boring people we would be. I’ll make you a deal…when the time is right you open your little satchel and I will pull my U-haul around the corner… 🙂
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A very good friend of mine told me one day when I was having difficulty getting excited about anything, “Get off your own back and out of your own way”. I am learning to do just that and the changes have been amazing. We all need new ways of looking at things sometimes just to shake things up a bit. To remind us that the ruts we sometimes create for ourselves are not serving us in the best way.
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